"That show was so retarded!"
"My boss is making me work on Saturday. She is so retarded."
"I can't believe you said that! Retard!"
To you, these may just be words. You didn't mean it in a bad way. Well, to millions of people with intellectual disabilities, their family, their friends, and those who have taken the pledge - it is mean and it is bad.
It makes me both pissed and sad every time I hear the dreaded r-word. I am pissed that people would still think this is okay to say - especially around me. Um, my son has Down syndrome remember!? If your child had Down syndrome, would you still say "Did you see the game today? They looked like retards out there!" I doubt it. Because what do you mean? They looked stupid, pathetic, slow, incompetent???
It just slipped out on accident? It is okay, we are still friends. We are all human and many of us grew up in the 90's when everything was "retarded". But it isn't the 90's anymore and we aren't 12. It wasn't okay then and it definitely isn't okay now. Say you're sorry and move on. But please - for the love of Clay - try to refrain from using the r-word in the future. Not just around me but - ever. It doesn't make you sound cool. Honestly, it is something tweens say as the "ultimate slam" and for the thrill of saying a "bad word". It doesn't make you sound educated. Would you use other demeaning slang in your everyday language?
...and it makes me sad. Like literally I want to cry...and sometimes I do later when I hold my sweet boy in my arms. I want to cuddle Clay forever and shelter him from the big, bad world. Clay has a tough enough road ahead of him, he doesn't need this.
"So, what's wrong with 'retard'?," he asked. "I can only tell you what is means to me and people like me when we hear it. It means that the rest of you are excluding us from your group. We are something that is not like you and something that none of you would ever want to be. We are something outside the 'in' group. We are someone that is not your kind." - John Franklin Stephens, a man from Virginia with Down syndrome via A Word Gone Wrong
"Most people would never call a kid with cognitive disabilities a "retard" to his face (and if you are a person who would do that, step away from this blog and go search for your soul). If you wouldn't say that word to my child because you know it's offensive, you should avoid using it elsewhere, too. Either way, it's demeaning. Either way, it hurts my child." - Max's mom via Love That Max
Please watch this powerful video also made by Max's mom.
So stop saying it. Stop allowing others to say it. Today is the day.
How could you be mean to this face!?
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